year end speech 2006. hahaha.
no la, just some pros and cons and losses and gains...

an eventful year.
however, this year passes super fast, like a fast-forward train ride.
so fast that looking back, i seems to have done quite a number of things.
on the other hand, say alot also can't consider as alot, while saying a few also can't consider as a few.
so fast that it seems like only yesterday that i received my o's results. haha.

my 2006
i have......
-gotten into jjc for 1st 3 months.
-joined jjc's lion dance.
-cured my hatred and fear towards lion dance.
-understand alittle more of lion dance.
-gotten into ngee ann.
-gotten into the course of my choice.
-joined np lion dance.
-make quite a number of friends.
-passed 1st sem of year 1.
-got a boyfriend.
-gotten a job.
-quit job.
-earn some money.
-successfully promoted to 2nd sem of year 1.
-gain quite alot of knowledge.
-knew some hypocrite people.
-break up with boyfriend.
-grown alot. not in height, but in the way of my thinking.
-stronger bonds with my dear f7 sisters =))

hmmm, good and bad/ ups and downs/loss and gain.
goods and ups, for i've gotten what i wanted and yearn for; like getting into the course of my choice, etc etc...
though i kind of had alittle regretted. but i will, die die also will complete my studies. its my choice afterall.
bads and downs, for knowing some hyprocrite people.
happy for my gains but i don't feel sad over my loss, weird, maybe i had never like...
but hey! i'm happy with my life=))
not considered exciting but for me its good enough.

didn't went for countdown this year.
too last minute alr.
i don't like going town during this time of the year too.
too many people causes hunam jam. and i don't really like body contacts; esp. strangers and b*****. hahaga guess yourself =D
so, counting down at home with my sis and bro by playing sparkles and watching channel 5.
hahaha. eh, don't laugh okay. at least i have childhood. ahahaha.

days without lappy...

... is so not good.
my lappy is hospitalised for 3 working days.
but who will work on monday? its new year you know.
and who will work on tuesday? its public holiday you know.
so it will be wednesday till i see my bao bei lappy.
sian. no lappy do project feels so not right.

watched charlotte's web.
supposed to watch night at the museum at 11.20am.
but ya...
overslept and end up watching charlotte's web.
some funny parts. one ignorant pig.
both penny and i don't find it touching and somehow kind of boring.
but penny's sister cried.

after movie, me and penny watch a free show.
ah bengs fighting.
my life being endangered at that point of time.
i wonder why nobody call the police?
i guess we just like to watch free show huh.
hahaha.
nice punching but no bloood.
okay, i'm not evil.
i don't wish for anyone to get hurt in that ah beng fighting.

less than 24 hrs to new year!
lets welcome 2007 with big big smiles.
alright i shall go sleep and return blogging later on, with a brief summary of what i have learnt in 2006 and with new resolutions for 2007 =D

Saturday, December 30, 2006

brain racking

was surfing the net for my project.
found out that perception has some link to psychology.
after all its the study of human relations/beheaviour/personality in organisation.



and...


i come across this sentence;
"It is your attitude toward life that determines life's attitude toward you."
meaningful.
though i don't really get the meaning.(maybe my brain is shutting down alr)
awhile later, i find that i can't find any relevant information.
so i switch to doing CIP.

CIP
description of the product that we are selling:
-about the product that we are selling.
and i find that i need to see what sort of accessories we are selling.
before having the idea of how to describe our product.

CATS
i need to find a plain ring, to do up our model of a ring mouse.
i mean really plain and of certain wideness, so that we can draw things on the ring.
anyone got any suggestion of where to buy that?
must be cheap and real cheap.
then don't want to spend so much on a project.
arghh!! really is the lamest and useless module i ever had.
still need the summition of the product that nobody had come up with.
like we were able to come up with a real ring mouse.


then i went to read somebody's blog.
my head was like spinning.
i have to really rack my brain to think what she is blogging about.
i only managed to catch part and parcel of it.

what she said seems to bring some meaning though.

but...
on second thought her situation seems kind of worse?
whatever is the case, it just so happen that i click upon her link, and realised that i'm very fortunate.
for there's someone out there who are experiencing something more worse.
and then i come to feel pity her and feel happy for myself.
hahaha.
i'm being so inhuman.
here i am feeling happy when i come to know that there's someone who is feeling not so very happy.
haha, cause i know i love myself more.
eh, me being happy is not build on someone else sadness okay.
just that i feel i'm so fortunate as compare to those who meet in a mishap and i should not demand so much.

*text are edited for her interest*

what she said was:
it wasn't the first time that i'm seeing this.
however, the feeling wasn't good.
all the things she get was what i used to get.
how good will that feel?
perhaps perhaps......

it's really hard.
when you once gotten hurt deeply.
you will tend to protect yourself.
and trying to change my thinking or to come out from that protection shield can't be done overnight right?
i need time.


of all her other december entries, this is the only entry that i understand.
i'm not stupid or what.
just that she goes in cricles before making her stand more defined.
aiya, its really difficult to understand what she is trying to express.

overall, i just feel so bless.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

alot to blog but....

that right, but
i just forgot what is it that i want to blog about.
arghhh, stm ah.
after christmas, new year will be arriving.
time to come up with new year resolutions.

oh ya...

belated merry christmas to all!

i had a great christmas and christmas eve this year=))
though i didn't get to eat log cake this year, due to too many people and the log cake is not big enough to cater to the people presented at my uncle's house. let alone 'da bao' home like the previous time.
hahaha.
oh well... there's always next year, like 364 more days.
hahaha. its okay.
a turkey, a half-done steak and few pieces of ham is also good enough.
and thanks for all the presents.
i'll will get fatter at the rate that i'm eating the cadbury milk trays and ferrero rochers.
thanks zhijuan for your present too. (i've got your present and you got mine=))

and

we know how to cook spaghetti. at least its edible.

i haven touch any of the projects yet.
CIP- i think we need to review what we had done the previous time for there's some changes.
OB- we haven touch that yet.
CATS- nothing have been done yet too.
so many projects due when school reopen and so little time.

tml(wed)
i finally am going to bring my lappy for servicing.
it's really giving me so many problems. hate it.
1st i cannot bluetooth anything.
2nd the battery life is really short.
3rd it will out of the sudden hang whenever i didn't connect it to the adapter.
4th i just realised when i was using my lappy just now, its the worst that i can ever imagine, i cannot surf the net, sign in to msn or anything.
really is cannot. i check all the switches and the cables and its still the same.
i give up and use the house com instead.

so now i'm transfering everything thing from lappy to thumb drive(s).
so ma fan!

ok. enough of grumbling.
its 3.25am. i need to and am going to sleep.
meeting penny at 10.30am later to go to acer center and sony ericsson.
and meeting the rest of the F7 for k-session at 1pm=))

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

differences between fairytale and reality

once upon a time...... happily ever after...
or
happily ever after...... once upon a time...
or
once upon a time...... once upon a time...

in fairytales its once upon a time...... happily ever after.
in reality its happily ever after...... once upon a time.

this time, i'll choose once upon a time...... once upon a time.
hahahaha. that's the irony of life.
_____________________________________________
woke up super early today, like around 9am.
no choice. have some work to do.
then around 1.30pm i went NP to do CIP project.
but...
opps, i reached at around 2.05pm?
so so sorry to kosin, shirin and zhijuan. =S
having headache over CIP.
all the softwares and hardwares and domain names and ISPs and policies and dreamweaver and venture capitalism. but still i think its better than BCA.
haha.

at the very least we got zhijuan and kosin, who knows how to do the dreamweaver thingy!=))
busy doing project till its 7pm plus plus.
too absord in doing project that we didn't even notice that time flies.

so i rush over to accompany penny to go over to tamah jurong cc there.
penny!!! don't say i not friend enough liao hor.
so tired can!
one day got to do so many things plus brain cells all used to do CIP.
luckily kenny drove me home, while lawrence drove penny home and chester to lakeside.

finally!!!
i come to realise that knowing someone who have a driving license is so good.
go everywhere also no need to worry for transport home.
nono... rephrase.
should be if i have the driving license jiu hao.
next year next year...
just 2 more months. then i will go learn how to drive if they haven change the acceptable driving age to 21.
my mum promise to buy me a car if i get my driving license.
am waiting=))
just hope she don't bluff me can liao.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

summarised

waste my time going for training.
the lion dance room the door can't be open.
but i still learnt something in other aspects.

hypocritism.
you can lie to others.
you can think of ways to cover your lies.
but
you can never lie to yourself.

someone said 'by cutting off the part that makes the apple bad, the bad apple will be just fine.'
what if the whole of the apple is rotten?

morale of the story "人不可冒像, 海水不可抖量"
a very good real life example.

i promise i open my eyes real big next time to avoid any sway-ness.
seeing is not believing, believing is seeing.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

happy birthday!

to penny....

HAPPY 17 BIRTHDAY!!!

quick quick candles are melting, blow the candles.
hahahaha.

and really thanks alot for helping.
xin ku le.
though i already know what i should do from the very start of this whole thing.
but i dragged till today.
over and done with! the feeling is so relax and good!!
don't say i not human hor. LOL!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

me

long awaited!
finally!
finished my tests. stress-free.
_____________________________________
wanted to go home after test to get some sleep.
but... but... but...
i went escape instead.
with zhijuan, gary, jianzhou, linmin, russell and 2 other guys.
(sorry if i spelled your names wrongly and if i can't remb your name.)

$6 for entrance fee plus free ice-cream, free carnival games,
most importantly free cotton candy! cotton candy my favourite.
worth the 6 bucks for unlimited rides.
only that the wheather is too hot.

and

what a way to release all the accumulated stress ever since...
can't remb when.

photo time:



the 1st ride we took; the train.

zhijuan and i took e 2nd sit; e green one.

2nd ride we took; rainbow.

3rd ride we took; pirate ship. jian zhou and linmin.

2 people VS 3 people.
someone relaxing beside me ah. hahaha.

4th ride. looks scary, but its not at all scary.

linmin me and jian zhou.
hahaha being blocked by the railing.

resting time.

still resting. LOL!

look at russell. smiles a thousand.

after resting, we went to took this ride.
shortly after we finished the ride, it began to rain.
so we went to the arcade.

along the way...
we came across this....
it looks like a bath-tub filled with bubbles.
looks real beautiful.



argghhh, being attack by this kids, and we made funny faces at them. LOL!

look.... almost hit the hit score.

see... hit the high score record.
ya, not we played one.
its a couple, should be husband and wife, played one.
they were so pro! every ball went in. except some.
with the probability of 0.90 that the ball will go in. LOL!
we thought after they hit the high score they will stop playing.
but they continued playing.
makes me wonder if they are bball coaches ma. haha.

back to escape...

haunted house!! i will never go in again!
wah lao, i screamed all the way till i came out of the house.
ya, screamed. though i didn't see anything.
except maybe a man carrying an axe and chasing us. LOL!
so pai seh.
all the other rides i didn't even screamed, or maybe i just go along with people screaming.
but haunted house! argghh, don't talk about it alr.

after raining.
this cloud looks like god will appear shortly.

then we went to the beach...
never felt so relaxed in a long time.



look at the vast sea. no end no boundary.



eh, don't fall asleep, later you slide down the slope.
don't worry, we will............



laugh at you. hahahaha. just kidding.

escape looks nicer during night time as all the lights are lighted.
and
byebye escape.
what a fun and relaxed day.
______________________________________________
finally had the time to stop and think over some things.
i am more able and willing to think.
sound like microecons huh?
demand and supply that chapter...
the consumers are able and willing to buy.
hahaha. nightmare.

i am back to being myself. =))
i won't be sad/ stress for too long,
if not i will not know how to be myself. =))

Thursday, December 14, 2006

gonner

wahhhh ahahahahahaha

i going to go mad soon.
i can't memorise all the things.
time! i really need more time!
of all the modules i have studied so far.
CIP is the most boring most useless most bo liao most most most....
no sense module i have ever study.

my head gonna crack. blah blah blah.

cip.

great. CIP.
so many chapters to memorise plus micromedia dreamweaver.
brain cells using up almost=50%.

friday.
when tests are over.
when i can be stress-free.
the day i'm so looking forward to.

i mind too much about my grades.
that's my weakness.
so much so that during tests/exams period, i will somehow shut myself off the outside world.
and somehow not be myself when tests/exams are round the corner.

i hate this me.
i hate being so not me.
i hate all my modules.
i hate bstats.
i hate cip.
i hate mircoecons.
i hate ob.
i hate ocom even more.
i hate studying.
i hate feeling so stress up.
i hate doing projects.
i hate doing tutorials.
i hate what i don't like doing.

the only thing that i like was last sem modules minus bmgt.


BUT


i will be fine. really.
after friday.
i will be back to myself.
my smiles. my persistence. my brattyness. my spoilness. my wilfulness. my not being so anything-ness.


for now----------------> study!!! shoo.

Monday, December 11, 2006

random

i give up.

a short story...

one day,
on the way home with his mother,
child A saw child B.
child B was holding onto a balloon.
being naughty and jealous as a kid will get,
child A snatched the balloon from child B.
task accomplished.
happy and contented, child A continued his journey home.
along the way, the string attached to the balloon snap.
and the balloon floats up towards the sky.
child A cried.

do you know what his mother told him?

she said; ''told you not to snatch the balloon from child B. what does not belong to you, will eventually leave you. even if you manage to get hold onto it for just a few second.''

people always smile to cheat others and their feelings (ben's copyright)
true. agrees.

have a little faith in myself, my work and my decisions.
true. agrees.

bstats...
here i come.
embrace me into your lovely world of mathematical problems.
yucks. headache.

christmas is coming real soon.
like in 14 days?
just love christmas to bits.

i really should get back to studying.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

taking a break from studying.
if not i'm going to go crazy soon.

i'm so tired.
adopting the early lifestyle makes me feel more tired.
whywhywhy ah?

christmas is coming!!
something to look forward and be happy about.
cause
christmas=presents =))

Monday, December 04, 2006

add on

NP printer is so lousy.
level 5 printer room was full.
so we went to level 6.

level 6.
arghhhh, printer is more lousy can!!
cannot even work.
wasted energy.
ended up going down to level 5 the printing room -.-"

and someone just complained that someone press e wrong printer.
and she help him print his notes out.
and her papers are used up.

who's fault?
the girl not did not pay attention to what she was printing and was printing blindy.
or
the guy who didnt look at which printer he was printing.
...
or wireless fault?
too many printer in one room causes confusion?

now a girl just just cut queue to print the notes.
haiz, can't tell that we come before her ma?
and was waiting to print notes for like so long alr?
so we started a cat fight with her.
and having her ended up with injuries all over.
LOL!!!
no la, just joking.
we are such nice people =))
we talk. not fight.

bstats lecturer

arrghhh...
i want to do the evaluation on lecturers.
i want to give bad evalution for today's lecturer.
he is so....................
i have got nothing to say.

i have no idea about how to calculate confidence level based on probability.
the rate he was going, was like he assumed that we had already learn before and was doing revision with us.
but in the fact is we don't.
i asked my friends how to read the value.
none of us was sure and that lecturer didn't even go through.
this is what he said :"you will be able to know how to do as the time goes along.
what the...

i attened lecture basically for the fact that i want to learn something at the end of the day.
to achieve some knowledge at the end of the day.

arrghhh,
he is taking a free pay.
doing an easy job.
this sux!

Saturday, December 02, 2006

worn out

i'm going to be drown in this level of stressness.

stress about bstats common test.
i know nuts about that subject.

stress about the microecons common test too.

stress about the advisor giving me stress.

stress about today receiving a letter from NP, saying that i have not been attending tutorial.
and in the letter it even state my MC.
i had MC.
send me letter for what.
wth, last sem i was absent for once and i didn't even received any letter.

stress about how to approach my cousin for help.
he is always there when i ask for help and he will help in whatever ways he can.
that's the more why i don't have to face and the courage to approach him anymore.
and i am truly and sincerely grateful to him for helping.

stress about lion dance.

even stress when i'm playing tennis.
scared i'm not good enough.
scared i'm not in the correct position.

stress about things.

stress on letting my parents down, when i don't live up to their expectation.

stress on even to drop tears of stressness or angerness.

i'm going to be drown soon, if these continues.

i have no more energy to cope with any unhappy things.
i'm scared of unexpected things to happen.
please, i'm so so so mentally tired.
please, don't make comparison between me and the others.
please, i'm not going to be the one to replace other people mess for what others didn't do.
my smile is being wipped away.

fable will devour, the tale i will keep by my side when i'm lost.
i am now lost, so lost, that i have decided to keep the tale.